Being yourself often sounds so easy. Aren’t you being yourself all the time? However, what about when you don’t feel quite like yourself? In a world full of expectations, how do you define who you are? Within that, how do you be yourself as a woman?
There are so many ways, archetypes, caricatures, symbolism, and styles a woman is expected to show up in the world. Your parents, friends, neighborhood, community groups, and country all promote these various ideas and pass them down through the generations. On top of that, it can be challenging to simply be yourself when everywhere you go advertisements and social medias are promoting the same or new ideas. I think this is part of what people are discovering over the last few years - the effect social media has on mental health, identity, and wellbeing.
Under all those layers of expectations, let’s say winter jackets, sunglasses, hiking boots, Starbucks coffee, chunky earrings (that may have served a purpose) is you. But how do you get through all the layers to see yourself let alone be yourself?
When I was younger, I spent a couple of years exploring my gender identity. In my early twenties I did not fit into the group at all. In an effort to be accepted, I tried redefining who I was. I learned a lot about myself while exploring my gender but my life sucked. I found myself working really hard to have relationships, friendships, intimacy, and even a spark to my life. I felt so rejected as my wishes never manifested. It was true that I was fitting into the group but I was miserable trying to be somebody else to be accepted, loved, respected, and a part of my community.
Once I started meditating and learning tools that helped me to better understand what is and isn’t my energy / what is and isn’t me, my world started opening up. I took big and small steps to embrace my femininity and being a woman. I was learning how to really be myself as a woman. It wasn’t a perfect journey. I messed up, had accidents, got sloppy but I also had fun, was more creative, started performing, and some of those wishes came into my life too. In being more myself, my life was more validating, exciting, and so much easier. This new acceptance was so healing and brought with it new questions that opened me up to myself on a deeper level.
With the advancement of technology and how our society is growing around identity, there is always some way a woman is expected to show up in the world. Then there is you. What if you can simply show up as yourself? What would be possible? What would you experience? What would you create? What would you explore? How would you open up to yourself?
Starting in January, I am teaching a five month class that will explore being a woman. Various topics will be covered, with a number of new tools, to help support your growth as you start to dig into your experience of being a woman in your life. For a woman, it can be particularly validating to be in community with other women exploring a similar theme in their lives. This is The Women’s Healing Salon. The prerequisite is the Art of the Seer Training. For additional details, you can click here.